I went to the funeral home to pick up mom’s ashes. The funeral director asked me, “Did you want to place the ashes in the urns yourself or did you want me to do that?”
First of all, what a weird question! How many people opt to do that themselves?? Second, I’m like a three year old on a meth binge when I try to pour a glass of *milk*, man. Do you really think I can manage pouring my mother’s ashes from a large cardboard canister into three tiny little urns and *not* have it wind up like some kind of Lucy Ricardo horror show? Really? Nah, I’mma let you handle that, big guy.